Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Hey Now, You're An Allstar!-but you aren't playing


Zach Duke and Freddy Sanchez-

Congrats guys, you two are a fraction of Baseball's best this year. You have the stats, you have the character, and you aren't pumping roids (knock on Louiseville Slugger wood). Therefore, we'll be inviting you to participate in the MLB All-Star game, to represent your team, the Pittsburgh Pirates.

Oh, but you might not leave the dugout, bullpen, etc.

You see, the coach could be drastically concerned about winning a fairly meaningless game, and therefore decide to sit you out in case you're desperately needed in a non-guaranteed extra-innings situation.

And extra innings is a female orgasm; it just doesn't happen unless the sluggers bring their big bats.

So, while the other guys (that didn't get it done) are getting 3 at bats, or giving up earned runs like it's Hanukkah, you two can sit on the bench and sip your all-star gatorade. just keep it away from Carlos Zambrano.

Sorry Buccos, your team doesn't exist according to the MLB.

Honestly, i've never been a fan of the all-star game. I like the home-run derby, I like the recognition of great play-but the meaningless competition really puts a cork in the bat.

But if you're going to have this game, to have the cream of the crop compete against each other, then at least make sure the guys get to play. If the recognition and representation is what the game is all about, then that should be the priority of the game-not a win. And let's not pretend that the game is do-or die.

Although the Pirates arent' the pride of the league right now, it's still important that great players get recognition. shouldn't baseball at least pretend that each team has a chance in such a buy-out league?

So yes Duke and Sanchez-you're all stars.

but keep sipping that gatorade, keep sporting that Pirate P. although we can barely see it outside of the dugout.

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